Roommate Rituals: How Small Traditions Build Big Bonds

By Ashley Paskill

Living with a roommate in college, whether in the dorms or off-campus, can be difficult. You may not know each other well, but getting to know each other will help you make the most of the school year together. One way to do this is to have rituals and traditions that you do together to help get to know each other and bond.

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Roommate dates

One way to bond is to spend time together, and this can be accomplished through roommate dates. Pick one day a week when you and your roommates are free and dedicate some time to doing something together. This can be anything from dinner to spa night and more. Take turns picking an activity, or have a set activity that you do during this time. Be sure you allow time to talk, even if you do something active.

TV shows

Many people dedicate time to watching TV shows with another person, be it a friend or a romantic partner. This is something you and your roommate can do together as well. It works especially well for live TV with shows that are released the same time each week or with streaming platforms that release one episode each week. Even if it is a show with all of the episodes already out, dedicate time to watching the show to do so with your roommate. Resist the temptation to watch ahead, or things may get heated!

Game night

Games, whether they are card games, board games, or video games, are a great way to bond with your roommate. They are a fun way to be competitive and relax. You may even opt to invite friends so you can get to know each other’s friend groups as well. If you have enough people, you may even decide to do a full tournament or play on teams. Take turns picking games and have snacks on hand. Try not to be too competitive as this may lead to hurtful comments that you did not mean being said.

Cleaning day

While you may have different schedules and chores, it is more fun to do your cleaning together to hold each other accountable. Pick a day and time to clean together so you can each do your fair share of work while having fun together. Create a playlist or listen to an audiobook to help distract you and make the time more pleasant. Doing cleaning tasks together will allow you to get more done, especially since you have a dedicated time for it. It allows you a chance to work together to take care of your living space.

Mini book club

If you and your roommate love to read, host a mini book club where you read a book, preferably outside of your assigned school reading, and come together to discuss it at a chosen date. You may decide to read one chapter a week and discuss it weekly, or choose one book each month and discuss it at the end of the month. Take turns picking the book, and have discussion questions on hand to help jumpstart the conversation. This will allow you and your roommate to find out what each other’s interests are and what opinions you have on certain subjects within the books. Having these discussions, even if you disagree, will help you build confidence in sharing opinions and concerns with each other when you do not agree on the issue at hand.

Exercise class

During college, it can be difficult to find ways to stay active and be healthy. Find your campus’s gym or another local fitness facility and go to an exercise class together. The dedicated day and time will hold you accountable to actually go, and you will be spending time with your roommate. Consider trying something completely new, as this will give you a chance to learn something or even laugh at yourself in the process. Having someone holding you accountable and a day and time to put in your planner or schedule will make sure you actually go and hold yourself to staying healthy, even when things are busy.

Campus club

Your campus likely has student clubs and organizations. Find a club that fits your schedule and your roommate’s schedule as well, and go to meetings together. The meetings may be weekly or monthly, but they are a chance to spend time with your roommate, meet other people, and pursue something you are interested in. The clubs may be connected to your chosen field, or they can be a fun hobby like crafts or poetry. Use these clubs as a chance to build your network, even if it is not connected to the career you want to pursue.

You and your roommate will be living together, so even if you do not become best friends, it is still a good idea to get to know each other and spend time participating in traditions and rituals that will bring you closer together.